Everything always comes out in the wash. My mother used to tell me that when things weren’t going well in my life. As a kid, the family ironing was my job, so I knew that literally wasn’t true – but I knew what she meant. If you just hang around a little while and roll with the punches, what seems like a monumental problem today becomes trivial later.
2012 was not a good year for me in a lot of ways, but in some ways it was wonderful. I’ve grown so much this year – the last six months in particular. After the most horrendous summer of my life, autumn started out to be more of the same – until I’d had enough in early November and decided that rolling with the punches wasn’t good enough, and I needed a break. I needed to take charge of my life.
As soon as I took hold of the reins of the life that was spiraling out of control, the laundry came clean. I look back now and think, “Why on earth did I let it go on that long?!” I’m glad I did, however, because I learned a few things. I remember as a kid watching logs burn in the fireplace. A good piece of hard wood will withstand a whole lot of heat before disintegrating. It will char on the outside for a long time before the fire begins to break it down and destroy the inside. I used to take the fire poker and move logs around before they would begin to break down. Instinctively, in early November, that’s what I did to myself – I removed myself from the flames before I broke into pieces.
As I began to cool, I realized that the Holy Ghost had not been present in my life for several months. He cannot abide where there is contention. By allowing the flames to continue to whip through my life, I had removed myself from Him. The embers have given way to ash, the Spirit has returned, and my life is at peace. I’ve felt more peace in the last two months than I have in a long time. It was awesome that this peace should come in time for the Christmas season. It was a true gift from my Heavenly Father. I was allowed the sweet pleasure of time to contemplate the birth, life, ministry, and atonement of Jesus Christ. That is a gift I will treasure forever. The gift allowed my heart to soften, heal, and to forgive.
So where do I go from here? I see 2013 as opportunity for more growth – and more writing. Yes, writing! My life was in such turmoil that I didn’t have a creative bone left in my body, and I didn’t have anything of value to write. The break allowed me to get a handle on the muddled thoughts in my mind. 2013 may just be the year of clarity.
Everything does come out in the wash. Sometimes a little bleach is needed, but everything does come clean.